A month in craft…

Where does the time go? No, rilly, someone in physics please tell me because I need to claw some of this year back and update this blog properly.

In the mean time…

I made this for our sister iPad mag. Kinda love it. Made with left-over fabric from the Tweed bow necklace I did for them a while back (but still available on the Apple Newsstand, peeps). Hubs helped with the cutting (I'm not massively handy with a pair of scissor, which I blame entirely on my being left-handed (and not just crap at cutting), and then it's just a case of a bit of appliqué. Nice huh? Be sure to select some soft fabric or you'll be in for a restless night…

I've also **fanfare please** taught myself to crochet. I know, I know – despaired in an earlier post about those who can attesting to its ease ("Oh but it's eeeeaaassssy!" they'd scoff, which would usually be met with a thunderous look from me).

See that there? That's 40+ crochet hexagons.

It's… not easy. No, rilly. But it Does. Just. Click. All of a sudden. From out of nowhere. One minute all I can do is a chain, and then next, I'm trebling and cackling and getting ever-so-slightly tangled p in my yarn.

I swear, I have no other explanation other than I just kept trying. I also used a slightly weightier yarn than all the other times (Aran), and I also watched a lot of YouTube videos to get it non-squiffy in my head. I think YouTube definitely helped – those stupid diagrams of pencil-drawn hands just weren't cutting it. Crochet is my new love, and (although I am scared of doing anything much other than a granny square – for now) I can't see myself going back to knitting any time soon. I know – I never thought I say it. And me from last year would totally be seething at me from a few seconds ago for typing it. Sorry, Past Me (also, you should really check out YouTube for some tutes, m'kay?).

Anyway, thanks mainly to Pip, Ros Badger and Indie Lovely for their inspiring throws, cushions etc. And thanks to countless crocheting YouTubers. I apologise I didn't make note of your vids…

Knitted bow ring

Remember my knitted bow I did a while ago? Meet its young sibling, the knitted bow ring – gifted this xmas to my BFF, Amy (who is also modelling it above). Nice huh? It's basically a long thin (I think I cast on four or five stitches) strip of stocking stitch, folded over and with the yarn wound around the middle as usual. Then hot glue gun (or tie) onto a ring back and you're done. Cute huh?

Chain bag

Happy New Year! Are we still allowed to say that? A busy Chrimbletide season for the Monty household. Lots of Christmas crafting, then a certain someone's birthday, plus new year, so I've only really got back into the swing of things now, plus the Mollie team have been busy busy on our latest issue, hence the net silence. But onward!

One thing that's been keeping me busy but is such a pleasure has been crafting for our sister iPad magazine, Gathered by Mollie Makes. You've already seen a sneak peak of the bow necklace from issue 10 and now here's my chain bag from issue 9.

Massively simple, the only tricky bit is cutting (or getting a locksmith to cut) the chain to the right size. Then it's just some glue gun fun. So simple, **I** can do it.

Look out for more goodies from me coming to an iPad near you…

Tweed bow necklace

Super excited about this latest project for Gathered by Mollie Makes (out 21/12 - what a good date!). I've always wanted to do a tweed bow necklace but a combination of not having enough confidence (and not getting my Singer skills on) meant it had been sitting in my head for a while, crying like a puppy left outside a shop. Nice image…

Anyway, it's (again) an easy make. Took me all of ten minutes more or less. You can sew it if you like, but I made mine from hemming tape. Check it out coming to an iPad near you this Friday

Christmas bauble bunting

One of the main rules for shopping in Poundland: make sure the thing you're buying isn't faulty. When buying baubles from Poundland (and especially when buying a crap-load of baubles from Poundland) you should rilly make sure they all have little dangle-thread things for which to hang from your tree, no? Shame I didn't take my own advice.

But what to do with them? Well, all my wreaths had been made (which you can see here and here) so I couldn't do a bauble wreath (which actually I was quite glad about - not sure I have the patience for that) and I'd just made a load of paper bunting from an old book so did a bit of crafty maths and came up with bauble bunting – or Baunting if you will. Again, blummin easy, and better than tinsel.

Christmas bunting

[caption id="attachment_279" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Paper bunting[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_280" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Paper bunting[/caption]

Because we're having a cheap Austerity Christmas this year (and mainly because neither of us can be arsed to head to the loft for the tinsel) I decided to make some Chrimbo bunting. Remember that book I mentioned in my paper wreath earlier? Well I had some pages left, so I thought, "Why not?" It's a good one for in front of the telly, and is super-simple and quick to do. Yes, my paper bauble bunting has the word "vomit" in the middle of it. Ho ho ho…

Christmas wreaths chez Monty

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas…


After I made my first (trad) wreath (this red velvet and gold one, in fact), the bug bit, and I just had to make more. I knew I'd be making an obligatory yarn wreath before I tried the trad one, and was pretty chuffed with how it turned out. I made sure I cut the felt flowers on the wonk – no, rilly I meant for it to be like this – as I thought it would make them look more real (altho quite how real a felt flower can get, I have no idea).

Next up, my third and final one. Wasn't sure what to do for it, until I found a left-over book in the office (it was an old covermount from a magazine we'd got in). Loath to stick it in the recycling, one of the team suggested I use it for my final wreath. And **ding** an idea struck. Ripped into strips and dunked in a bit of PVA/water mix, it looks pretty awesome (even if it was uber messy). I was going to do some book flowers (like the felt ones above) but decided it needed a pop of colour. And so, a good-old pom-pom or two!

Button earrings

An nice easy one, this.

Get a button, if necessary snip off the shank (are they called shanks?) using some heavy duty pliers (I used garden shears).

Hot-glue-gun it on to an earring backing and you're done!

Our wedding

Start spreading the news
He's Dave Montrose today
He wants to be a part of her
Sarah! Sarah!

His high heeled boots
Are really quite... gay...
But she has married him anyway!
He's Dave Montrose!

He gets to wake up
With a woman... at last
Oh yes those jokes about sheep
Are all in his past



His neat little beard
Hasn't even been shaved!
He'll make a brand new start of it
As Dave Montrose!

Now he's a married man
He'll get some when she says he can
That's up to you
Sarah, Sarah...

**Talking interlude** Ladies and gentlemen I would like to take this opportunity to talk about a man that Max and I both love dearly. A man who has in the past been known by many names...

First there was of course Tupper
Then Tupps, Tuppy, The Tuppmeister
or The Tuppinator.

Who could forget that international hit single that he inspired - My Tupps my Tupps my lovely lady Tupps - Check him out...
Then there was that somewhat disturbing if entertaining video in which he starred and which went on to become so popular on the internet: Two girls, one Tupp.

But from this day forth he shall forever be known by one name because...



**sings**
He's Dave Montrose!
He gets to wake up to a pretty awesomo treat
To find he loves Doctor Who
And Radio 2
He's not a cocknose
No, he's Dave Montrose...

Tonight he's counting his luck
Getting ready to ffff....all asleep
She'll make a brand new man of him
In her own way!



Now he's a married man
He'll love her all he can
So here's to you
Montrose and Montrose!

Ladies and Gentlemen please raise your glasses to the happy couple, David and Sarah Montrose!













Today I will marry my friend – the one I will live with, dream with and love. David/Sarah, when I’m with you, I feel I can be the person I want to be, and I cannot imagine my life without you.
You make me smile, you stick up for me, you take care of me and you are always interested in what I have to say and do.
Today, I want to make a promise to you and to myself, in front of our friends and family, to love and honour, protect and respect you for the rest of my life.
I vow to trust and value your opinions, and stand by your actions. I pledge to always treat you as my best friend, and equal. I will ask for help when I need it, and offer help when asked.
From this day forward I will cherish you. I will look with joy down the path of our tomorrow's knowing we will walk it together side by side, hand in hand and heart to heart.
Let us be friends and lovers, and grow old together. And let us make all the years of our lives together be the best years of our lives. For now and forever.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Dress Mae Bridal
Shoes Euphoria Boutique
Flowers Stems of Marsh Gibbon
Photographs Adam Gasson
Groom's suit TM Lewin
Hair Amanda Morton, wandmmorton@aol.com
Juke box SM Juke boxes